A Minnesota Court of Appeals today ruled on one of the most pressing issues of our time — can you drive a segway while under the influence? The court held that a person operating a “Segway” is not a driver of a motor vehicle and is not, therefore, subject to the prohibitions of the Minnesota Impaired Driving Code, Minn. Stat. ch. 169A (2010). The case involved Mark Alan Greenman, who was arrested for a DWI for driving his Segway in a street with a blood alcohol concentration of .19. The decision discusses a previous Minnesota decision in which the state’s highest court found that a drunk man on a mobility scooter was not “driving” either. The decision was made by a three judge panel, of which one judge dissented.
So, I just finished watching season 2 (series 2 to you Brits) of Sherlock and it continues to be great television. Sherlock the BBC television series is not to be confused with Sherlock Holmes the Robert Downey Jr. movies. Although admittedly I have not seen the 2009 movie or its sequel, I think they look like standard Hollywood shit. Unlike these movies, the Sherlock television series is a retelling of the Sir. Arthur Conan Doyle stories in a modern day setting. The show focuses on a genius private detective (i.e., Sherlock), which is played by an actor with what must be the most English-sounding name ever devised — Benedict Cumberbatch Dr. Watson is played by Martin Freeman (the Jim character in the British version of The Office and the new Bilbo Baggins), a British veteran recently returned from service in Afghanistan.
Until this jerkoff is publicly humiliated as the bearer of false witness (read: lying motherfucker), hypocrite, sanctimonious prig, home-schooled, socially retarded, lobbyist dick sucking piece of shit abortion that he is, tarred and feathered, ridden out of town on a rail, and sent to slink back into whatever rectum he oozed out of, this gif stays on the front page. You’re welcome.
I just found out about the “Bad Lip-Reading SoundBite” series highlighted recently over at Funny or Die (via BadLipReading.com), which matches video of presidential hopefuls to gibberish (not really that different from real life now that I think of it). Awesomeness abounds as you hear Herman Cain freak out about big potato moths, Rick Perry requesting goats for the computer industry, Ron Paul promising free bananas, or Bachmann discussing proper etiquette for prison parties.
At a press conference on the recent crackdown to remove the Occupy Wall Street protestors from a park in New York City, Mayor Micheal Bloomberg declared that the first amendment did not give people the right to erect tents in a public space. If I had a time machine, I would like to take Bloomberg back to the Hooverville in Washington D.C. in 1932 and ask Bloomberg to tell the Bonus Army that they were exceeding their right of free speech. I am shocked that the mayor of a major American city doesn’t know enough about history to know that protestor encampments have a long history in this country, including many famous examples.